Do you want to know why most people, once they face death, are changing their lives? If yes, I invite you to pour yourself a cup of hot coffee, find a comfortable place and start reading what I have to share.
We live surrounded by fears. Fears induced by our culture, our environments, our families, our education and our society.
Fear is necessary, especially when you’re in actual danger. When we feel fear, our body enters into an alert mode. Everything within ourselves, starting with the tiny parts, such as atoms that form our cells, are grouping and regrouping for survival. Fear is what keeps us alive in actual dangerous situations.
Tomorrow’s interview or 1-2-1 is not an actual scary situation, but it can be in your mind. And one of the challenges that the modern human being faces is the transition from tangible to mental constructs.
If we are to take out the real dangerous situations in which we need to feel the fear to survive, we’ll soon realise that most of our fears limit us. Once we manage to overcome them, we become fearless, we feel brave, and our self-confidence blows.
Most people are full of life after overcoming a challenge that threatens their lives because they overcome their fear of death. They have accepted the helplessness we all have in many of life’s scenarios.
When I’ve been in that difficult situation, I’ve accepted the idea that death is part of my life. And when that happened, it felt like my eyes were suddenly wide open. It felt like a veil was removed, and I could finally see the actual intensity of life colours.
Naturally, I would say that there’s no point in mentioning what removing the veil meant to me.
But I see every day how so many people lose themselves on less important details. Making everything about themselves, about their unhappiness when they don’t get what they want. They face human challenges, they feel misunderstood, their car is old, their house is tiny, and they need to do overtime to pay for their holidays. Holidays time in which they’ll probably check their emails and keep working.
I’m far from denying the importance of everything mentioned. I’m looking to make a point that sometimes we can get the wrong image of what really matters.
Removing the veil for me meant a better understanding of what is really important to me and where I want my focus. It also made me realise that while I may be feeling helpless in some situations, in others, I’m completely in control. It helped me understand what my limits are and what it takes to overcome them. I realised what balance means to me. I understand now how big and small I am at the same time. I became much more aware of myself and life in all its forms.
The quality of my life improved when I accepted myself exactly as I am in all my roles. When I understood that what I hated about myself were high expectations imposed by culture, society, or family, I was resisting and failing to fulfil. I looked at those parts of me like something wrong and despicable that I should get rid of it as soon as possible.
Constantly trying to eliminate them, all I could do was make them even more obvious – increasing their resistance and cause an even greater discrepancy between who I was and who I should have been by understanding that I understood the root of my pain. I knew what I had to do, and I start doing it right away – loving myself, embrace my life, accepting that one day I’ll die, and that moment can be at any time.
Such a shift of perspective changed my life and everything that followed.
You should know that it is not a one time job, but a daily job.
As recurrent as I close my eyes each night, being grateful for the day I had, wrapping it up and then let it go.
As recurrent as I open my eyes each morning, being grateful for another opportunity I have to make my life great.
Here’s some take away from you:
Have you ever wondered what you would like to be remembered for?
