Since the start of this year – 2016 – I’m closing chapters of several aspects of my life and opening new ones without planning. After more than six months of:
- Daily practice of decisions under pressure;
- Failing in almost all the aspects of my life;
- Deep sadness (or depression, call it as you wish);
- Struggles and inner-conflicts;
- Wax and wane of my emotional state of mind;
- Hard work on learning how to deal with simultaneous challenges, after denial and acceptance;
- Seeking for inner peace and my inner-smile;
- Self-acceptance and forgiveness;
- Seeking for help and auto-motivation
I have managed to be able to close some doors from the past, but there are a few more that need to be closed too. Everything on it’s moment. I have managed to get back with huge luggage of learned lessons, more experience and much more motivation, feeling more strong and happy that I’m here and I can write these lines, smiling and talk about it.
Why I’m doing it?
Because everyone speaks about success and very few talk about failures. I failed in many areas (almost every area of my life), but in one I manage to not fail: in keeping myself alive. And this is the most important. Somehow with all my “failing expertise”, I have succeeded in the most important one. Which makes me look at all the failings that I’ve had during my lifetime as part of the learning process. And from this perspective, I can only feel proud of myself, proud of passing through all of it and grateful for everything that I have learnt by now.
– Is this easy?
– Hell, NO.
– Is it painful?
– Hell, YES!
– Does it changes you?
– YES. In fact it makes you become a better person, wiser and more confident in yourself.
What I lived in the first seven months of 2016 – which was probably the hardest period of my life, where I faced depression, and also when my life totally changed – gives me the right to say that closing the door to the past is the best decision that one can make for himself if the seeking is to be happy and to live his life, instead of counting the years passing by. Living in the past is causing only pain and keeps people away from living.
Stop cheating on the future with the past, is over.
#novavida #newchapter #enjoylife
