Tl;dr:
- This article is about the power of letting go and the benefits of a simple lifestyle in my journey to a brighter future. It's about my journey of learning to trust myself, which led to a more fulfilling life.
- This article isn't for you if your plans align with yourself; you're self-aware and living your life exactly as you want.Are you tired of feeling overwhelmed and stressed by the constant need to have everything in order and be prepared for anything?
Many years ago, I used to be a hoarder, gathering everything because I believed everything had its utility at some point. I’ll never know when I’ll need it. As I can’t control what can happen, at least I can be prepared. Be prepared, have at least a plan B and C, and a few alternatives and strategies just in case – these were my mantra for many years. But little did I know this mentality covered up hidden wounds and prevented me from living the life I truly wanted.
But hey, it helped and served me well, and I’m so grateful to my younger self for developing them.
So I had a life with plans and strategies, alternative plans too. Everything seemed to be in place, and my life was looking ok, or at least that is what I thought until I started feeling that something was off and that it was not the life I wanted. Not in that place, not in that way, not with those alternatives and clearly not with those compromises. I decided that it must be something more and that that way wasn’t my way, not the way I wanted to live.
So, when an opportunity came, I took it and decided to move abroad with just a suitcase – my first exercise of living with very few things.
Also, in the first years, I often changed places and usually lived in one room. So, I bought almost nothing – mainly because I hate caring for myself. And that was my first time understanding that preparing for the unprepared is about trusting myself to find and get whatever is needed. There is no need to collect things just in case.
That was when I decided I’d be a collector of moments and very few basic things and that when I settled in some place, I’d get more things.
While experiencing this simplicity, I decided to keep my physical life as simple as possible and not gather things. It was the moment I realised I needed to let go.
I started with letting go of things, then of some beliefs and even of myself in some cases. Or better said, of what I thought was myself and what I identified myself with.
In this process of self-discovery, while rebuilding my belief system, I realised I needed to let go of my ideals, people, projects, and clients.
As I came closer to experiencing the fact that there were no priorities but only one priority, my life became brighter. So, I started to focus on a priority each time. Then, to take things slowly and, most importantly, not force them, my life puzzle pieces began to come together. Finally, life started to happen for me, not to me, and the so-called synchronicities appeared. Better, I began to be lucky.
For the first time after more than a decade, I don’t have a structured plan for 2023, and the word for this year is slow.
And all of this happens because of our baby, which will be born this year. Being pregnant helped me realise how vital taking things one at a time is.
As much as I would like to take credit for this process of slowing down, it wasn’t me who started it. It was a consequence of pregnancy. A requirement, actually. So I was forced to slow down, and I had to work with myself on adjusting my mindset into accepting being slow, and that’s when magic was revealed to me. After decades of multitasking and trying to slow down but never making it, I finally live every moment as it comes. This pregnancy is changing me, and I love the new me because:
The new me is accepting her slowness.
The new me is enjoying every moment of this pregnancy as there will be no other the same.
The new me is transitioning to a simple living with a slow lifestyle.
The new me is living in the moment.
The new me is calm, peaceful and at ease.
Slow living, simple life – that’s what I now think to be my best approach to 2023, which looks very promising for a transformative year.
I’m writing these because, like you, I also manage my expectations and know how challenging it can be. But through cultivating self-awareness, I learnt that lowering my self-expectations is about creating space for growth. It is about self-care, self-love, self-esteem and self-confidence. I thought it was about low esteem, and I was so wrong.
So if you don’t have a plan, it’s ok.
If you do have a plan, it’s ok.
If you have a plan, but life doesn’t happen like you planned, that’s ok too. And valuable because it brings you new information about yourself which you might not be aware of.
Sometimes, our plans fail or don’t happen because they weren’t meant for us. We wanted to pursue them just because we saw that others have it, that for others is working, without asking ourselves if that’s what we really want and how it will make us feel.
When this happens, I do an exercise that helps me a lot. It’s simple: I ask myself why I want what I want, and then I picture myself in the moment of having it, observing how it feels in my body. It feels good, it feels meh, it feels awful? The answer that comes from this exercise is the only answer that’s aligned on a body-mind-spirit level for me, which makes it the correct answer for me.
Therefore, I invite you to take some time to ask yourself why you want what you want and then picture yourself in the moment of having it, observing how it feels in your body. The answer that comes from this exercise is the only answer that’s aligned on a body-mind-spirit level for yourself, which makes it the right answer for yourself.
I invite you to let go of the things, beliefs, and ideals that no longer serve you and trust yourself to find and get whatever is needed when it’s needed. Embrace a simpler lifestyle and see how it can lead to a brighter future.
Please share this with your friends and family if this resonates with you. Let’s start a conversation about the power of letting go and the benefits of simple living.
Kindly,
Monica
